The Phoenix
by imsuchanut
Summary: Just a drabble about regeneration; the feelings, the thoughts, and the worries as the Doctor changes into someone new. Set after Gamestation, from Nine's POV to Ten's. It's based off of Fall Out Boy's "The Phoenix".


**A/N: This is just a little fic about regeneration, inspired by Fall Out Boy's **_**The Phoenix**_**. Thanks for reading, please review! It really does mean a lot.**

_Put on your war paint_

Sometimes it starts as an adventure gone wrong, others I know for sure that it's coming. Either way, I get this ominous feeling in the back of my mind. It tells me something's going to happen, and I hope that the feeling doesn't mean I'm going to have to lose another companion.

_You are a brick tied to me that's dragging me down  
Strike a match and I'll burn you to the ground  
We are the jack-o-lanterns in July  
Setting fire to the sky  
Here, here comes this rising tide  
So come on_

I have an affinity for humans. They're wonderful creatures, so full of life, and they find importance in the smallest things. But, they're only human, and I'm a Time Lord. Superior biology, me. They can build me up or drag me down, because they're not as impervious. Sometimes I feel like a babysitter; watching the kids for a little while, attempting to have fun, but always trying to keep them out of trouble.

_Put on your war paint_

As it gets closer, the ominous feeling grows stronger, until finally, I'm about to die. I'm reborn, almost, but it still feels like dying. I suffer all the pain, and literally all of the cells in my body change.

_Cross walks and crossed hearts and hope-to-dies  
Silver clouds with grey linings  
_

When it's happening, I almost wish I was dying. It hurts so unbelievably bad, in the moment I just want it all to stop. Regeneration is a dangerous process. So much could go wrong! I could end up missing parts, accidentally myself or people surrounding me, and I'm impulsive and dangerous after.

I try to keep my companions safe when I regenerate, but often all I can do is tell them to stay back. Course, not all of them listen anyways. It seems like such a great concept; you get a new body (and if you try hard enough you can pick it out), you get to live, and you're healed. But in reality, it's dangerous.

_So we can take the world back from a heart attack  
One maniac at a time we will take it back  
You know time crawls on when you're waiting for the song to start  
So dance alone to the beat of your heart_

Despite the pain, I can't give up. I'm the last of the Time Lords. I have to protect this universe, take it back from the evil that threatens it. So I have to deal with it, keep the pain and regeneration energy all in until it finally starts. I can't rely on anyone else to protect the universe, so I must do it alone. So many beings need me, so I'll keep going, alone if I must.

_Hey young blood  
Doesn't it feel like our time is running out?  
I'm gonna change you like a remix  
Then I'll raise you like a phoenix  
_

Rose. She's young, so very young. Me? I'm nine hundred. I'm forty-five times her age. But somehow, I'm completely, madly in love with her. Actually, that doesn't even quite describe it. I care for her so much that I'm going to die for her. And I'll willingly do it again and again and again.

I've not told her about regeneration, though. She's looking at me like I'm mad, and I think she thinks that this is really the end. No time to explain, though. I just need one last goodbye, from this me. I hope she doesn't leave after this. My time as this me is running out, but I hope our time together isn't. I have this feeling though that everything is about to change.

_Wearing our vintage misery  
No, I think it looked a little better on me  
I'm gonna change you like a remix  
Then I'll raise you like a phoenix_

Oh, Rassilon. She's looking at me like I'm a monster. Well, I guess the process was rather unnatural, and I probably should've explained, especially since she is so jeopardy-friendly and I would die for her without a doubt, so it would've been best if I explained before so she wouldn't be so surprised if I happened to need to die. But is it really that weird? I mean yes, I kissed her, practically exploded, turned into a new ma-oh. Oh no. I'm rambling! I just can't seem to stop talking, and it's in my head too! That's gonna take some getting used to.

She's still looking at me oddly. I got her to smile, but what's she staring at now? Oh. Oh. I'm in his clothes. Well, my clothes, but they belonged on old me. I don't have the body for them anymore, and even though I haven't looked in the mirror yet, this feels like a good body. Attractive, even.

I'm going to have to convince her I'm the Doctor now. I haven't done a very good job so far. I look different, I talk different, and the regeneration's gone a bit wrong so I can't control myself. How do I show her I'm the same? Because essentially, I am. It's kind of like a remix, same song, it's just changed a bit, but the song is still recognizable. Ooh, a remix. That's good. What else can I compare it to? Harry Potter! Wait, no. He's the boy who lived, and I basically just died. Hmm…Fawkes! The Phoenix! Yes, I'm just like a phoenix! I burn up, and a new me is born from the ashes, but I'm still the same. A remixed phoenix. That's quite catchy actually.

_Put on your war paint_

Oh, Rassilon, this isn't going right, we're going to crash!

**Thank you so much for reading! Thoughts? Criticisms? Questions? You know what button to press! I'm open to prompts, so if you have any feel free to leave em in a review, or send a PM.**


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